Aftermath
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There are times when we feel deep regret and relief at the same time. I
finally admit something to myself that I longed struggled to admit.
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-Relief, for I finally had come to a conclusion. I achieved the solution
on a problem that wasn’t really hard to solve anyway.-
-Regret, because I found out that no matter how hard I try, it never
is going to change.-
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It feels good to finally find myself. But the horrors of it’s effects
still haunt me.
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Along with my admittance came my strong urge to tell somebody about it.
Who did I tell? Someone important to me of course. She might be bitchy
towards me, she might hurt my feelings at times, we even fight at times,
but it’s times like this I’m glad to have her in my life.
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She just accepted things, and made me better bout myself. God knows how
lowly I see myself now… But she managed to save me from the spikes.
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Yes, you might be wonderin who she is, I’m not in the position of revealin her,
but once she reads this… She will know it’s about her. I gained a new level of
respect towards her. And I now believe that she indeed, is a real person.
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Sometimes I wish my life was like a novel or a movie, where the events
have an ending. You know, everything just ends, no one needs to suffer
anymore after the big rain.
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Unfortunately, life isn’t like that. Along with this acceptance… comes
trials in life…
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It’s funny how life slaps you in the face, and how life uses that very
same hand to comfort you when all seems hopeless.
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I think I had enough being everybody’s fool. Fooling people is really
easy, but fooling yourself? That’s another story.
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As a great friend of mine said, a sailor’s advice,
"In the middle of a storm, the best way to survive a great wave, is to
head to it straight on, and ride it"
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Maybe that’s what I’m doing now, riding the wave.
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On the sidenote:
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The infestation problems are finally over. I learned that
money does indeed make life easier.
October 28th, 2005 at 6:25 am
what the? what are u talking about here? seem to be hiding something
ps u look older in your default. lol! u’r not a small little boy anymore OLD OLD OLD!
October 28th, 2005 at 12:26 pm
Well, what can I say? I’m a very complex person. Always the one who makes people keep on guessing.
And yes, I’m looking more and more like the crypt keeper. God, don’t rub it in.