Of Paradox and Loopholes;

clickety click here! - http://sintheimpaler.livejournal.com

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let the retardism and hilarity ensue!

They believed they were gods…

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Ship codename “Eternal“, Serial No. 3Y3Z-Y4HwEH:

Entering hemisphere. Warning, crash landing inevitable.

Initiating life pod ECt-11.

10%

20%

28.9%

Initiation failure.

Terminating ETERNAL program.

Terminating life support.

Evacuating staff…

10%

20%

30%

Evacuation failure.

——————————————————-

“And God said, Let there be light: and there was light.”

Eternal entered the planet’s hemisphere, out of the 230,402,200 colonists designated for transfer, only two life signals remained.

It crash landed and destroyed 80% of the planets inhabitants.

Aftermath:

A girl about 20 with deep black eyes walked out of what appeared to be a lifepod.

Upon further examination, one would see that she was actually pregnant.

“Adon, I Evaleth Morthimew will live. I’ll live and I’ll wait for you. You promised… For me, and for our baby boy, Adam…”

Silent tears were wept. Earth was born.

here’s a summary:

Christianity: The belief that a cosmic Jewish Zombie who was
his own father can make you live forever if you symbolically eat his
flesh and telepathically tell him you accept him as your master, so he
can remove an evil force from your soul that is present in humanity
because a rib-woman was convinced by a talking snake to eat from a
magical tree

Five, the demons are wailing. The dead smiles before the living.
The angels screech. Bursts of blood, they will drink.

Four, the priests cry blood. The people beg forgiveness.
The crying lady stops crying. The laughing boy stops laughing.

Three, the old man dances. The unborn baby smirks.
The untold story unfolds. The future is split.

Two, death is denied, life is denied. God’s aborted child smirks.

One, the traveler wakes up.

A million warriors, all trained to kill with unnerving efficiency and speed versus
a broken island, floating aimlessly.

This is where the world began, and this is where is will mostly end.

The Holy army of the Republic of Russia versus the spears of the unnamed nation now currently floating near the oceans of the Southeast Asia.

—————————————————————————————————-

General Chong-Wei the Flagship of Russia, he was a man born of death, he lived for death and will die for the mere reason of death.

"Ten soldiers? They sent ten soldiers to match our 300,000 men?" He said, spit flying from his mouth. "How dare they mock us so?"

————————————————————————————————–

yes they are…

yes they are…

"Forget my name." The tiger said.

But the wolf kept on talking. He didn’t want to forget the tiger. He thought it was stupid.

The tiger has made up his mind however.

==============================================================

The owl was still pissed.

The tiger was still hurt.

The wolf was still oblivious.

Or was he…?

Could it be that he wasn’t as oblivious as he wanted them to think? Could it be that he actually knew everything and observed everything keenly? Could it be that he somehow knew where everything was heading? If so… why did he keep his mouth shut?

The wolf knew but didn’t want to get involved…

Somehow though, he did, while the wolf was hunting for food in the nearby grasslands, the tiger came and walked near to the wolf.

The tiger was clearly pissed but also was clearly out of line clawing the wolf. The wolf, suprised at the sudden aggression when all he did was offer a piece of candy, fought back. That was the last straw, he thought.

The wolf overdid himself and almost tore the tiger’s heart…

"You had this coming, you need to stop being such a kid and grow up. Everyone has their fucking emotions but instead of lingering on them, they move on. You’re not the only one who exists here. Do you even get that?" the wolf said after spitting blood, he continued to stare at the tiger as he was walking away. "Forget the fucking poachers."

"Forget my name." the tiger said.

"I highly doubt it." the wolf barked back. "But just so you’d know, it wasn’t me who walked away. I’m here."

And tiger left.

And the wolf waited…

He lit a cigarette and waited.

i didn’t know how, or why, it all happened so fast.

too fast that i never had the chance to blink, it was there in front of me.

a fortress of floating heads,

a castle of rotting bodies,

it was all in front of me.

"ten minutes sir, ten minutes left"

i heard on my left, i looked and saw a mother holding a child.

"get out of here now, time is not ours to waste"

i had ten minutes, nothing more. ten minutes before my end was affirmed.

as i tried climbing the seemingly endless tower i saw as stalacites fell from above killing both mother and child on impact.

"tick"

nine minutes left, i was doubting i was ever gonna get out of here alive.

"tick"

eight minutes, arms of those who claimed to love me started crawling from the pool of blood just a few feet below where i was standing. grabbing my arms, not wanting to let go.

"tick"

seven minutes, a swarm of watchful eyeballs, some were rotting, some were brown, others stabbed by pins of various sizes were seemingly flowing in a constant waterfall of some brown liquid i dare not examine.

"tick"

six minutes, the bodies of the dead were chasing me, strangling me with their cold lifeless feet.

"tick"

five minutes, the skies opened at rained swords at all the sinners of the world. stabbing those who go against the will of the true god. impaling the blasphemers.

"tick"

four minutes, faceless children laughing and crying at the same time, started climbing on my back, biting me hard, i could feel my flesh being torn, a searing pain. extreme terror.

"tick"

three minutes, i was tired, and i didn’t want to go any further… ten minutes was just not enough. why am i climbing this tower in the first place? i knew from the beginning that i only had ten minutes.

"tick"

two minutes, i loosened my grip, there is just too much pain in my back now, blood was constantly flowing from where the demonic children bit. there are still scratch marks on my neck from where the cadavers strangled me, i was cut in various places from when the swords rained.

i cried, i smiled. then i let go.

"tick"

one minute, i closed my eyes as my body was about to hit the ground. at that very moment i felt peace, one second later… the world was bathed in red.

its the end for me huh.

guess all things must come to an end.

mine is really close.

not that my life was good anyway, but yeah. the end… it’s near.

just a few more words…

yes.

just a few more…

the end for me is almost here.

it’s now…

i guess i’ll see you next time huh?

for now, i must end…

Due to the lack of sleep I’ve been getting lately and effects finally taking a toll on me. I decided to rearrange my daily activities to fit me more sleep.

‘

‘

‘

That means less video games and more zzzs on my bed. Hmm… that could work… Except for the fact that:

‘

‘

A. I hate sleeping

B. The neighbors dogs are in heat(and making some… uhh… uncomfortable noises to the human ear)

C. I hate sleeping

D. Damn "Walter Sullivan" from silent hill keeps on poking my ribs and pulling my feet.

E. The sandman insists on pouring sand to my eyes during broad daylight, which could be the cause why I’m having red eyes for the past few days.

F. I look like a vampire, and vampires aren’t supposed to sleep at night.

G. Did I mention the constant shaking of the ground which could be caused by my overly active imagination a.k.a. Sadako trying to shake my bed?

H. I abhorr sleeping.

‘

‘

Uh… time for plan B. More video games and less sleeping. Now that my friend, would definitely work other than the fact that I already look like the crypt keeper with red eyes from obvious lack of sleep.

‘

‘

No wonder my fat neighbor thought I was the ghost of her dead nephew last night.

‘

Bags+Fat Ladies whose neck looks like a vagina=Not Good.

Not Good+In you Face=Possible Injuries to your nose(PITYN).

PITYN+Nosebleed=Probable Permanent Damage.

‘

So much for PLAN B…